These days we see the night skies over the poorest country in the world lit up by the presents that good old Santa is delivering on his magic sleigh. No, it's not Christmas yet, but Santa decided to come early this year to visit the starving gaunt Afghani people and rain down on them food and oops a few bombs.

The bombs are really mechanisms for wiping out poverty, hunger and a few airports as well. And Santa, that jolly old fellow with a twinkle in his eye is being impersonated by none other than our most intellectual president ever! Though Mr. Monica Lewinsky is charismatic and dons very convincing innocent charms, he cannot compare to the wit and sagacity of George W. Bush…aka… Santa.

Santa is in his counting house, counting out his money (petrol dollars). Mrs. Santa is in her kitchen, eating bread and honey (thanks to those petrol dollars).

Santa's helpers, with the aid of the most sophisticated planes in the world are doing their best to wipe Afghanistan off the map. Just a bit of ethnic cleansing.

Tonight on the 4th night of bombing, in came our brave heroes, the 57 members of the Organization of the Islamic Conference (OIC) to save the day. In a plush humongous room, they met after gulping down the tasty morsels of their pre-pre-banquet. Such an impressive sight. Many gave eloquent speeches. Others fell asleep (behind their dark glasses while pretending to listen) having nothing better to do. Some of the better fed ones dreamed of banquets and more banquets to come. Such ignoble leaders had all been here before. Emergency meetings were nothing new. Take the Arab League meetings called because of Intifada Al-Aqsa. Remember how things changed almost immediately after the Arab Summit? Lots of eloquent speeches, a few tears, and then NOTHING. And as even as they left, Israel, our benevolent neighbor hit Palestinian areas (under the kind yoke of occupation) with missiles.

But we don't have to worry because tonight's conference ended in complete triumph and success. History has not repeated, I repeat, has not repeated itself! Our brave leaders, not concerned about the Palestinian children dying in the streets for freedom, not worried about Santa's gifts, decided to condemn terrorism and praise the benevolent bombing of Afghanistan. Talk about making a great impression on their people!

After the elaborate meals, our brave leaders were whisked back to their palaces and more important problems such as how to take more money from their people and how to make sure democracy and freedom remain fairy tale subjects in the minds of the muddled masses.

But they forgot one tiny little important element. Even though they pledged to donate $27 million to aid the dead Afghan corpses, if Santa's helpers just happen to kill Ousama Ben Laden while seeking to bring love and peace to the scrawny hungry little natives, the demise of Ben Laden will accomplish in death what he could never accomplish in life…he will be a symbol and hero to the oppressed Muslims wherever they are.